I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
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I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
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So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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