Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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