More tranny stories later!
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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