so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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