So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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