Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
