I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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