My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
