Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
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