Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize