Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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