I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
The Olympian is in my bed
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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