....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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