omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
i think im in europe. pls send help
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
