Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
