ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
