if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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