I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
It was like getting head from an anaconda
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize
