you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
