Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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