I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
