i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
