The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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