i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
The ass gains better be worth it
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
