like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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