worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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