Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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