Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
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