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• (310): View more from California

  Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.

  Fav 11 1169 3671

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.

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• (408): View more from California

  dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.

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• (516): View more from New York

  You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza

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• (518): View more from New York

  We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.

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