How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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