You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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