look no pants
its not stalking. its research.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
