This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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