I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
