Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
