we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
