so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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