Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
