according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Found your dick twin last night
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
