And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
so let's talk penis.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
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