I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
