i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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