Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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