Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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