Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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