Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
she told me i tasted like america
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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