Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
