i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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