After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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