I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
